I have been holding off talking about something because I have not really wrapped my mind around it. It’s a topic of something we all have to endure but is hard to discuss. This something is sometimes expected or unexpected in the way it just hits without any warning. One of my friends I have from knitting passed away late last month. She was always at the table on Fridays when we would all be there, laughing, knitting, and giving her opinion (which was always welcome) in a multitude of topics. I remember clear as day some of her stories, like when she traveled to a variety of places and their version of tea was not something she could drink (too much sugar or citrus), her disdain for coffee (understandable, I did not like it either when I first tried it), and her story of her pinhole film camera. She was not afraid to do anything she put her mind to and she was an accomplished knitter, weaver, jewelry artist, computer scientist, photographer, and with all of that, one of the most humble persons you would meet. Whenever we would ask her what she was making she would say, “Oh I’m making this pattern out of this yarn, but I’m making all of these modifications because of these reasons.” She would almost never knit something exactly to the pattern and would make some really good changes. She knit prolifically on socks and had a very impressive hand knit sock collection, which she used. I even got her to purchase an antique sock knitting machine (one that was already refurbished, because I told her the process and how when someone good does it, it’s worth the money) and she did start to use that machine.
I received the notification when I was taking my 10 days off from work and spending some well needed rest, it was the first day of my vacation. I had to stop what I was doing and just sit there, dumbfounded. I could not believe this happened so suddenly, even though we all knew she was going through some difficult health issues. We were all optimistic, as was she, that she would be around to laugh and knit around the table. I just could not believe that she was gone. I had to sit there and cry, which I am not afraid to admit to anyone. One of our knitting friends told me that she was helping our friends husband go through her stash and to arrange a yarn buying event. I considered it for a second, started looking through her stash on Ravelry, which was meticulously photographed and documented, and I lost it just in the “Bs”. I knew a lot of the yarn and I was there when she purchased it. I just could not bring myself to go through all of her yarn and purchase anymore, besides the fact I have a lot myself (not as much as some others). So I told my friend that I just could not do it, it would be too hard for me. She messaged me back and told me of something in her stash, that her and another friend of mine had to re-assemble that they thought of me. They knew that not many people would attempt this pattern with the yarn and knew I wanted to make it, missing out on the opportunity to buy the kit (the dyer has discontinued dying). I told her that yes, if no one else wanted it, I would gladly take it.
When I went to the memorial this weekend, there was a mix of her husbands friends, neighbors, and of course the knitters. We all talked about her, her life, and it was such a beautiful way to remember her. My friend handed me a bag, which contained the yarn in question. I was keeping it together fairly well through the whole thing and I was going to loose it again, but I did not. That yarn is from ColorShift Yarns and its the kit for Atlas by Kieran Foley, which is stunning. They knew that I would make this and I plan on making this as one of my next projects. It will be my way to remember her and do something that she would have done herself. Though this is not the exact kit, because she didn’t like the pinky flesh toned yarn and asked for more of the darker gradient. So that’s what I’m going to do, knit it just like she would, which surprisingly will be as written (besides the main color). Once I get the sweater off the needles at the very least, I am going to wind this yarn and knit on my memory Atlas. She will be missed by us all, but she will always be with us.